Dr. Appt Today

We've got a dr. appt for the baby today.  I'm stressing.  Ughhhh.  I was so not like this when I was pregnant with Kyla.  I really do wonder if a lot of it has to do with the fact that I thought my pregnancy was fine with Kyla until she was born, now I feel like I doubt what the ultrasounds are showing or that the doppler isn't working or that I can't trust the doctor.  Last appointment the doctor couldn't hear the baby's heartbeat but he didn't search very long to try to find it.  As in move the doppler over my belly a lot to look for it.  Just kind of held it in one place and moved it around a little and that's about it.  I'm nervous but am trying not to be...I just want to know my baby is healthy and growing and developing just fine!  It's been 5 weeks or more now since our last ultrasound.  You'd think with my history with Kyla they would be doing them more frequently.  Ugh.  I'm one nervous mama on the days of my doctor appointments.  It doesn't help anything so I know I shouldn't be.  I have been drinking my BOOST protein shakes everyday (just 1/day) to try to gain some weight, since the doctor told me I need to gain some.  I weighed myself last night.  I haven't gained any weight.  LOL, not surprising...it's like almost impossible for me to gain weight, always has been.  So I will probably get in trouble for that today as well.  I told my doctor last time that with Kyla I was 107 when I got pregnant, was super sick and dropped to about 103 or even 102 or something and then from there, when I delivered I was 117.  This pregnancy I started out at 103 and have remained pretty much at 103....I have only gotten sick once, but I also am just getting to the point where I can eat a lot and not feel like I might get sick after.  Who knows.  I need to remember to just give this all to God, he is in control and stop my little brain from worrying.  Hope everyone had a wonderful Chritmas and New Year's.  We had a relaxing New Year's, went to a local pizza place and then to a hockey game with quite a few friends and their kid's.  It was pretty fun.  I was asleep by 11.  Can't stay up super late anymore with this baby makin' me sleepy!  :)  Pray for good news for us today and I'll update you all soon.